News Columns

Conservative Voice: The Tijuana Tunnel: Why Walk When You Can Drive?

By Mark Carroll Feb 1, 2006, 15:16 GMT

Mexican authorities discovered a tunnel last week that ran from a warehouse in Tijuana, Mexico to a warehouse in San Diego.   This 2,400 foot-long engineering marvel was five feet high and as deep as ninety feet below the surface.  It had a pulley system, cement lined floors, lights that ran down one of the walls, a groundwater pump, and pipes that circulated fresh air.  Investigators believe tunnel construction began in Mexico in May of 2004 and that the tunnel became operational in November 2005.  A Mexican drug cartel is believed to be behind the tunnel’s construction. 

Having a healthy love of life and what I would assume to be a normal fear of dying, I am somewhat reluctant to criticize or in any way discredit the intelligence of a Mexican drug cartel (or a cartel of any other nationality for that matter), but I feel compelled to ask one question.  Are you guys stupid?  Do you ever read or watch the news?  Okay that’s two questions, but seriously, what were you thinking?  You don’t have to tunnel into the United States.  You can do like everybody else and walk.

Could this be irrefutable proof that drug dealers have congressmen in their pockets?  Would anyone else on earth, besides a United States congressman, waste money on such a useless project?  According to investigators the tunnel was operational for less than three months.  How much money was wasted on such a tremendous undertaking?  Do drug czars sit on $640.00 toilet seats, too?

Alaskan Governor Frank Murkowski’s barrel of pork was recently discovered when someone realized that he was building his now infamous “Bridges to Nowhere.” One of the proposed bridges connected Gravina Island, which has a vast population of fifty, to the town of Ketchikan.  The Gravina Island Bridge was slated to replace an grueling five minute ferry ride for a mere $229 million.  The second bridge would have served as alternative route from Anchorage to a little used port for the small price of $223 million.  Although some would argue that the tunnel had a valid destination and therefore would not warrant such a catchy name as the “Bridges to Nowhere,” surely you have to agree that the similarities are striking.  Could Murkowski be wasting drug money now?  Perhaps they missed his high profile debacle since they obviously do not read the news. 
It’s hard to understand how climbing eighty or ninety feet down a metal ladder to push your drugs in a wheel barrow half of a mile across the border would seem like a better idea than simply loading your stash in a Mexican Army escorted Humvee and driving across the border.  How much is a payoff to President Fox anyway?  I am joking of course.  I would never imply that the Mexican President is for sale.  The man has way too much pride to take a bribe.  Just look at this quote by President Fox:  “Mexico doesn't deserve what has happened to us.  A democratic change is urgent, a change that will permit us to stop being a loser country.”  Vicente Fox does not need me or anyone else questioning his ethics, what he really needs is a hug.

I have to admit, the discovery of the enormous waste of drug money did bring a smile to my face.  I am, of course, not suggesting that the drug cartel’s lack of fiscal responsibility was amusing.  It’s just a welcome relief to see other people’s money being spent on useless items like $436 hammers.  Apparently, tax-paying, law-abiding citizens are not the only people who get fleeced.  
 
(Monsters and Critics' columns are written by outside contributors. The views expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Monsters and Critics. In the interests of creating an open forum,  we invite you to volunteer a regular column of your own. To apply contact the "submissions" department via this form. Please include an outline and sample.)  



COMMENT

blog comments powered by Disqus

Latest Headlines in News

Older Talkback

Follow Us

Follow M&C on Pinterest

Search

Custom Search

Sites We Like

The Guardian

Also Check Out

Justin Bieber accused of assault

Justin Bieber accused of assault
Justin Bieber has been accused of assaulting a photographer in California after a physical altercation allegedly broke out when the paparazzo attempted to take pictures of the singer and his girlfriend Selena Gomez. ... more

Britney Spears' fiance makes romantic video for her

Britney Spears fiance makes romantic video for her
Britney Spears' fiancee Jason Trawick made a gushing video to tell the singer how proud he is of her US 'X Factor' debut in Austin, Texas, last week. ... more

Gary Barlow is boring

Gary Barlow is boring
Gary Barlow says his family are pleased he has been working on the Diamond Jubilee concert and single - because it has given him something new to talk about. ... more

Demi Moore meets up with Ashton Kutcher

Demi Moore meets up with Ashton Kutcher
Estranged couple Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher have reportedly met up with each other twice in the last month to discuss the future of their relationship. ... more

Kim Kardashian accuses British Airways of stealing?

Kim Kardashian accuses British Airways of stealing?
Kim Kardashian has accused British Airways of stealing from her baggage after a recent trip to the UK. ... more

Justin Bieber buys $6.5m home

Justin Bieber buys $6.5m home
Justin Bieber has splashed out $6.5 million on his very first home, a seven-bedroom mansion in the Californian suburb of Calabasas. ... more

will.i.am splashes out £15k on laptops for talented youngsters

will.i.am splashes out £15k on laptops for talented youngsters
Will.i.am spent £15,000 on computers for members of a youth music project in London after they impressed him with their talent. ... more

Rochelle Wiseman and Una Healy party on hen night

Rochelle Wiseman and Una Healy party on hen night
Rochelle Wiseman and Una Healy celebrated their forthcoming weddings to Marvin Humes and Ben Foden with a joint hen party on Saturday night (26.05.12). ... more

Justin Timberlake celebrates engagement to Jessica Biel

Justin Timberlake celebrates engagement to Jessica Biel
Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel celebrated their engagement with a star-studded party at Estee Stanley's Californian home on Saturday (26.05.12). ... more

Jennifer Lopez reunites with Marc on stage

Jennifer Lopez reunites with Marc on stage
Jennifer Lopez and estranged husband Marc Anthony reunited on stage over the weekend at their live finale of their TV talent show in Las Vegas. ... more